s"...People are willing to change if they have a compelling vision and are provided tools to help them bring it into being."
There's an old joke that goes:
Q: How many psychotherapists does it take to change a light bulb?
A: One - but the light bulb has got to REALLY WANT to change...
I do my best work with people who truly want to evolve. Evolutionary coaching is deep change work.
I'm not just interested in helping you to make your life better in one area or even several - I'm also dedicated to helping you create real transformation - the lasting change of realizing your very highest potential, and living the noblest vision you are holding for your life.
Holding an evolutionary perspective means that I work with what I see as the unmissable direction of the universe. All things, as the Sufis say are mysteriously drawn; "toward the One". This means, as much as there may be egoic resistance, inertia etc., I align with the evolutionary impulse in my clients that wants to resolve, change, surrender, create a deeply meaningful, satisfying, expressed life of contribution.
As writer Anne Lamott once said: "My mind is a dangerous neighborhood I try not to go into alone." I truly believe that transformational change is VERY difficult to achieve alone, without any kind of support or tools of some kind. Not that people don't suddenly become enlightened and ecstatically happy completely spontaneously - this apparently does happen, just that most of us seem to have trouble seeing our own blindspots (!) and benefit from support as we face ourselves and what evolutionary spiritual teacher Andrew Cohen calls our "irrational refusal to change".
I also believe that we don't just benefit from doing our "work" on ourselves as individuals, but that since we are all interconnected in myriad ways, that the benefits of our insights, breakthroughs, ah-has, improvements and the changes we make, extend way beyond our own personal lives.
If you are a leader of any kind, those you lead will benefit from every insight you gain, every time you make an inspired choice.
"You can only take someone where you have been yourself.
And there are no shortcuts." Brad Brown
My ultimate vision is that I believe, if we choose to, and given helpful tools, we could co-create Heaven on Earth.
I'm not claiming to know exactly what that would be like, nor even how we'd get there, but I believe it's possible for us, if we're willing to change and I have been a fanatical collector of the most brilliant cutting-edge tools, practices, perspectives and principles that can definitely help!
The Big Plus
EI like the expression of the two axes of spirituality - having a spiritual life is a BIG PLUS! The left/right axis is our desire to open ourselves to others, to reach out, to offer our gifts, our unique contribution to the whole - arms wide open, full out, hearts unprotected....
The up/down axis is our connection to the highest in ourselves and the "lowest" in ourselves - all aspects of the shadow are embraced - the golden and every shade of grey - we are embodied, earthed, bringing the lower into the higher and the higher into the lower.. again, with hearts wide open, minds wide open, bodies aligned, plugged in, deeply connected to the divine and to the earth.
This is why I love the idea that we could co-create Heaven on Earth... if we choose... One Plus..... (and the root of the word "plus" is related to "fullness" - a spiritual life is a fulfilled life!)
What it will take is for us to be wiling to take responsibility for our shadows and what's created them, do the necessary work to resolve them and become fully radiant beings.
Shadows are created by an object being placed in front of a source of light -I think of the shadow as the distorted behaviour pattern which has been set up by an event or decision made at some point during our lives (often in the first 6-7 years). It's this "object" - the event or trigger and the meanings we've made about it that needs to be attended to and resolved so they no longer stand in front of the light and cast their shadows.
How To Change
“One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.”
Everyone's busy - so here's the superfast version:
If you want to live a deeply satisfying, happy, meaningful life, all you need to do is:
a) know your true nature - who you really are
b) know your place in the world and in the universe
c) make all of your choices conscious
d) know what might get in the way of (c)
e) learn strategies to deal with (d)
If you need any help with this, you might be able to benefit from having a coach - particularly with parts c), d) and e)!
As an evolutionary coach, I can also help with a) and b) and at least point you in the direction of resources to inspire you.
In order to do any of the above, you may need to do some soul-searching and deep enquiry. You may need to face your shadows and recognize your light and you may need encouragement and strategies and practices that can help with this.
Deep change can happen by changing your conscious behaviours, but also by investigating and changing the unconscious patterns of thinking that set up the behaviours in the past. In my approach, I work with my clients from both sides to create lasting change.
I like Andrew Cohen's simple model of going from Minus One to Zero to Plus One. (His emphasis is different - please see his post for his inspiring insights.)
In coaching terms, Minus One equates to the "Great Undoing" where you get to compassionately bring your subconscious programming and anything as yet unresolved from the past, to face the light of truth, and into conscious choice and resolution.
(If you're not sure whether something is resolved or not, if you experience ANY uncomfortable feelings in your body about it at all, then it's not fully resolved.)
In coaching terms, Zero is where you become "empty" of the egoic self - having "no relationship to mind, life, time". Here, you surrender. This is the meditative kenosis.
From here, from "the ground of being", you recognize yourself becoming; fully integrated, "home", open-minded, open-hearted, curious, engaged, present, responsive in NEW ways, perpetually discovering the truth of your most authentic expression moment by moment.
Plus One (or ONE PLUS) is how this gets freely, powerfully, generously, uniquely, freshly expressed into the world, alone and in co-creation with others.
I love the idea of ONE PLUS... to me that suggests the mysterious truth that we are a) whole, perfect exactly as we are - and there is only One being (The Big Plus) and b) that One is perpetually becoming MORE, evolving through each of us, and even more thrillingly, through us when we consciously co-create TOGETHER!
My coaching can help you with all aspects of the -1/0/1+ equation. In other words to:
1. Resolve the past
2. Be fully present
3. Create an inspiring future
For more details of how I work with each of these areas, please see relevant blogs and forthcoming blogs.